If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize
