My brain says no but my pants say off.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Randomize
