he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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