Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
