His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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