you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
