Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
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