Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
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