The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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