I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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