I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
