Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
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