Say something about gay babies.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
