he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
