Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (607): people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome. http://tfl.nu/mqe3
  Replies (32) Good night (3663) Bad night (1058)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out http://tfl.nu/smzd
  Replies (20) Good night (733) Bad night (3409)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?

  (475): View more from Connecticut

  Yeah?

  (212): View more from New York

  Stuck it in his pooper.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (212): You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year? (475): Yeah? (212): Stuck it in his pooper. http://tfl.nu/y911
  Replies (209) Good night (10745) Bad night (4680)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning. http://tfl.nu/y7jt
  Replies (7) Good night (2286) Bad night (893)
• Favorite

  (705): View more from Ontario

  You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (705): You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden. http://tfl.nu/3tyu
  Replies (11) Good night (1972) Bad night (1157)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (949): He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love. http://tfl.nu/d65z
  Replies (18) Good night (3085) Bad night (1123)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call. http://tfl.nu/hx3q
  Replies (5) Good night (786) Bad night (3013)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.

  (443): View more from Maryland

  hey man, it was for science okay.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs. (443): hey man, it was for science okay. http://tfl.nu/r3mr
  Replies (10) Good night (1416) Bad night (458)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all. http://tfl.nu/l8qc
  Replies (5) Good night (1170) Bad night (505)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (715): It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful! http://tfl.nu/m6vl
  Replies (1) Good night (683) Bad night (322)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her http://tfl.nu/v0qt
  Replies (1) Good night (426) Bad night (314)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.

  (646): View more from New York

  You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (718): Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well. (646): You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response. http://tfl.nu/j3cp
  Replies (2) Good night (458) Bad night (338)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker http://tfl.nu/s38c
  Replies (0) Good night (554) Bad night (364)
• Favorite

  (936): View more from Texas

  There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (936): There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol http://tfl.nu/zyck
  Replies (7) Good night (628) Bad night (448)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology http://tfl.nu/f7q0
  Replies (6) Good night (758) Bad night (264)

Randomize