He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
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you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
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I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
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