So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Randomize
