Plan B is the new Plan A
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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