Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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