Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
