Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
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