He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I love you. Go after that dick
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
