Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Randomize
