youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
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girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
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