i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize