I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize