Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
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First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
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Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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