So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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