your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Randomize
