me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize