Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
