I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
someone get that fucking seahorse.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Randomize
