I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
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