I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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