Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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