i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize
