sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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