on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
