Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
