I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
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