It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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