the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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