At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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