what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize