what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
