everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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