The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Randomize
