I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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