Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
