Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Semen is not good for contacts.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
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