I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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