I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Randomize
