i just wanna soil my oats bro
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
It's never too late to be topless.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
My breasts were aching with rage.
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