I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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