This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
