I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
